I think I've really improved on not changing my layout so often. I'm proud. Sorta. I guess I have better things to do now.
So I've been thinking about it and finally I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not going to do anything. Okay, I haven't been thinking about it A LOT but it has been on my mind. I was thinking what would be the RIGHT thing to do to just find closure in all of this. And I think the best option is just to leave it alone. I don't need to clean up the mess that no one really sees or cares about. The only reason why I want to clean it up is because -I- see it and -I- care about it but I think it's come to a point where I don't -want- to care about it anymore even though I do. It's so long gone and just history. Why dig it up to clean it up? It's not like I don't have enough on my hands already.
I don't find it necessarily wrong for me to just leave it there, after all, I wasn't the only one who made the mess. Whether or not you decide to take responsibility of it is up to you, but it doesn't concern me anymore nor do I need you to acknowledge your responsibility in order for me to move on. If you ever decide to come back and clean up the mess, I won't be there to help you just because I've waited long enough and I gave you so many chances to prove me wrong. And if you never come back or if you never cared, then I know I've made the right decision today. It may have taken me longer to figure it out but you know the drill, "Better late than never."
I've been so tired of waiting with all the pieces in my hands, trying to understand it, justify it, put it back together somehow so I wouldn't have to feel so bad about breaking it in the first place. But I guess we were both too quick to judge, you only saw the bad, when I kept giving you the benefit of the doubt. So I'm done. The pieces are there. I'm not even going to bother burying it because I don't give a shit anymore and I'm just going to move the fuck on.
So I've been thinking about it and finally I've come to the conclusion that I'm just not going to do anything. Okay, I haven't been thinking about it A LOT but it has been on my mind. I was thinking what would be the RIGHT thing to do to just find closure in all of this. And I think the best option is just to leave it alone. I don't need to clean up the mess that no one really sees or cares about. The only reason why I want to clean it up is because -I- see it and -I- care about it but I think it's come to a point where I don't -want- to care about it anymore even though I do. It's so long gone and just history. Why dig it up to clean it up? It's not like I don't have enough on my hands already.
I don't find it necessarily wrong for me to just leave it there, after all, I wasn't the only one who made the mess. Whether or not you decide to take responsibility of it is up to you, but it doesn't concern me anymore nor do I need you to acknowledge your responsibility in order for me to move on. If you ever decide to come back and clean up the mess, I won't be there to help you just because I've waited long enough and I gave you so many chances to prove me wrong. And if you never come back or if you never cared, then I know I've made the right decision today. It may have taken me longer to figure it out but you know the drill, "Better late than never."
I've been so tired of waiting with all the pieces in my hands, trying to understand it, justify it, put it back together somehow so I wouldn't have to feel so bad about breaking it in the first place. But I guess we were both too quick to judge, you only saw the bad, when I kept giving you the benefit of the doubt. So I'm done. The pieces are there. I'm not even going to bother burying it because I don't give a shit anymore and I'm just going to move the fuck on.
