Medical school looks really far away right now, even grad school, which was my backup, doesn't look like a good plan B anymore.
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MY LIFE?! You know, I have seriously considered just dropping out and going to pursue music. Other than the fact that my parents would probably kill me, and I would struggle every day of my life to make a living, it IS possible. Right? LOL.
Words of wisdom: You should do something you like.
Well, I like to sleep and eat and blog. And go on youtube and facebook. But I can't exactly make career choices out of those things. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a PowerRanger. LOL. Although the Pink Ranger got all the love from the boy Rangers, I wanted to be the Yellow Ranger. Yellow because my comfort blanket was yellow and also because I thought she could fight so much better than the Pink.
To be honest, I think I just told everyone I wanted to be a doctor. I've never actually dreamed about it, never really imagined what it would be like to be a doctor. But then again, when I was a kid I didn't dream much about my future. I just imagined myself to be successful. LOL!!! Well duh, who the hell imagines themselves as a failure?!
So what do I do now? I have reached a point where I need to seriously consider the best option for me. It's no longer trial-and-error-see-how-things-work-out-just-go-with-the-flow. I thought of dropping out and just going to college and getting some job degree and getting my ass into the workforce. I don't know how easy/hard 3rd and 4th year will be and I sort of don't want to know... especially at UofT. I mean, when it's hard, it's REALLY REALLY REALLY impossibly hard. Ugh... I'm just not UofT material. But I also feel like if I give up now, I'll probably regret not even trying to finish getting my bachelors. And I thought of transferring to another university and doing my undergrad there, but that doesn't sit well with me either. Doing that will still make me feel like I gave up, except I would have a bachelors degree in my hand.
I still remember the days when I was in elementary school, and I got like an 80% on my math test and I nearly cried my eyes out. LOL!!! I remember just staring at the math test, running to the bathroom and just cried. My best friend came in and tried to comfort me and I told her how my life is over. LMFAO.
Then in high school, my first math test, I got 68%. And obviously, I didn't have any really close friends, so I had to hold in my tears and wait until I got home before I bawled my eyes out. HAHAHA. I remember just studying really really hard after that, and I don't know how, but I walked out of that course with a nice 80%, and this is coming from someone who was taught LONG DIVISION in grade 8. So I was so proud of myself.
Then in university, my first chemistry test, I got 30%. And I didn't cry, but I was just kind of shocked and in disbelief for like two weeks. And so I studied really really really hard. And I didn't finish the course that well. And I just thought, "Hey. It's JUST chemistry. If I work hard in my other courses, I can do well." And that... wasn't really true. Some courses, I'd half-ass study the night before and get this surprisingly good mark and I'd be like, "WTF?!" And other times when I study a month before the test, and I feel like I know EVERYTHING, and when write the test and walk out, I feel SO GOOD, but when I get my mark back, I would have no idea how the HELL I flunked it.
Sigh. Enough of a rant. I need to go study for my last exam.
God,
If you exist, can you please just pass me in all my courses? Honestly, I've never asked for much in life and even if I have, you've never given it to me. So please. PLEASE. PUH-LEASEEEE. PASS ME. I promise to never complain about my bad luck again. I promise to never beg for a pass again. LOL. I'll promise you whatever you want me to promise you. Just please give me a passing grade in all my courses.
Thank you.
-Stephanie
WHAT AM I GOING TO DO WITH MY LIFE?! You know, I have seriously considered just dropping out and going to pursue music. Other than the fact that my parents would probably kill me, and I would struggle every day of my life to make a living, it IS possible. Right? LOL.
Words of wisdom: You should do something you like.
Well, I like to sleep and eat and blog. And go on youtube and facebook. But I can't exactly make career choices out of those things. When I was a kid, I wanted to be a PowerRanger. LOL. Although the Pink Ranger got all the love from the boy Rangers, I wanted to be the Yellow Ranger. Yellow because my comfort blanket was yellow and also because I thought she could fight so much better than the Pink.
To be honest, I think I just told everyone I wanted to be a doctor. I've never actually dreamed about it, never really imagined what it would be like to be a doctor. But then again, when I was a kid I didn't dream much about my future. I just imagined myself to be successful. LOL!!! Well duh, who the hell imagines themselves as a failure?!
So what do I do now? I have reached a point where I need to seriously consider the best option for me. It's no longer trial-and-error-see-how-things-work-out-just-go-with-the-flow. I thought of dropping out and just going to college and getting some job degree and getting my ass into the workforce. I don't know how easy/hard 3rd and 4th year will be and I sort of don't want to know... especially at UofT. I mean, when it's hard, it's REALLY REALLY REALLY impossibly hard. Ugh... I'm just not UofT material. But I also feel like if I give up now, I'll probably regret not even trying to finish getting my bachelors. And I thought of transferring to another university and doing my undergrad there, but that doesn't sit well with me either. Doing that will still make me feel like I gave up, except I would have a bachelors degree in my hand.
I still remember the days when I was in elementary school, and I got like an 80% on my math test and I nearly cried my eyes out. LOL!!! I remember just staring at the math test, running to the bathroom and just cried. My best friend came in and tried to comfort me and I told her how my life is over. LMFAO.
Then in high school, my first math test, I got 68%. And obviously, I didn't have any really close friends, so I had to hold in my tears and wait until I got home before I bawled my eyes out. HAHAHA. I remember just studying really really hard after that, and I don't know how, but I walked out of that course with a nice 80%, and this is coming from someone who was taught LONG DIVISION in grade 8. So I was so proud of myself.
Then in university, my first chemistry test, I got 30%. And I didn't cry, but I was just kind of shocked and in disbelief for like two weeks. And so I studied really really really hard. And I didn't finish the course that well. And I just thought, "Hey. It's JUST chemistry. If I work hard in my other courses, I can do well." And that... wasn't really true. Some courses, I'd half-ass study the night before and get this surprisingly good mark and I'd be like, "WTF?!" And other times when I study a month before the test, and I feel like I know EVERYTHING, and when write the test and walk out, I feel SO GOOD, but when I get my mark back, I would have no idea how the HELL I flunked it.
Sigh. Enough of a rant. I need to go study for my last exam.
God,
If you exist, can you please just pass me in all my courses? Honestly, I've never asked for much in life and even if I have, you've never given it to me. So please. PLEASE. PUH-LEASEEEE. PASS ME. I promise to never complain about my bad luck again. I promise to never beg for a pass again. LOL. I'll promise you whatever you want me to promise you. Just please give me a passing grade in all my courses.
Thank you.
-Stephanie
